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‘Mijn ouders zijn streng islamitisch, dus als ik zou roken is dat al een blamage, laat staan blowen’

 started smoking weed at a very young age. For me it was a way of escaping from reality, it’s just nice. All my friends did it so it came quite naturally that I would do so, too. I’m very anxious my parents will ever find out because then I’ll be screwed. They are very Islamic so if they find out that I, as a girl, smoke that could do a lot of damage.

Sometimes I’m sad about it because I just want to be free to do whatever I want to. I really look forward to the future for when I get marries so I’ll be able to be free. At least, I hope so. 

When I look at other girls my age it reminds me how crazy how big the differences are. When I was younger, I didn’t quite notice it, but now I’m older it is started to become a thing. Girl my age just go out to clubs and festivals and don’t think twice about taking some molly or snoring a line. But I wouldn’t even think about doing so. Imagine something happens, then what? I would never be able to talk about it with my parents and I could never restore the family name.    But there is hope. Hope on a bright future. I want a daughter later so I can show her how parenting is supposed to be: free to do whatever you want to do. I know there are a lot of girl out there that have the same issues as I do and that we all hopefully look to the future. A future in which we’ll make a change, I feel that.