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Confessions of High Humans

Anonymous High Human (22, vrouw)

‘Mijn ouders zijn streng islamitisch, dus als ik zou roken is dat al een blamage, laat staan blowen’

 started smoking weed at a very young age. For me it was a way of escaping from reality, it’s just nice. All my friends did it so it came quite naturally that I would do so, too. I’m very anxious my parents will ever find out because then I’ll be screwed. They are very Islamic so if they find out that I, as a girl, smoke that could do a lot of damage.

Sometimes I’m sad about it because I just want to be free to do whatever I want to. I really look forward to the future for when I get marries so I’ll be able to be free. At least, I hope so. 

When I look at other girls my age it reminds me how crazy how big the differences are. When I was younger, I didn’t quite notice it, but now I’m older it is started to become a thing. Girl my age just go out to clubs and festivals and don’t think twice about taking some molly or snoring a line. But I wouldn’t even think about doing so. Imagine something happens, then what? I would never be able to talk about it with my parents and I could never restore the family name.    But there is hope. Hope on a bright future. I want a daughter later so I can show her how parenting is supposed to be: free to do whatever you want to do. I know there are a lot of girl out there that have the same issues as I do and that we all hopefully look to the future. A future in which we’ll make a change, I feel that. 

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